For Wei Ying and Ahn

[lan_wangji]

Lan Wangji already has a multitude of regrets. They are not about Lee-gonxi nor about his faith that he and Wei Ying can find a way to help him.

Wei Ying had been enthusiastic about the idea of inviting Lee-gonxi to their new home for dinner, intrigued by the idea of investigating a new type of magic, sure about the desire to help Lee-gonxi but far less so at the idea of meditation. In fact, most of Wei Ying's enthusiasm seemed centered around having a new drinking partner and the meat that Lan Wangji has prepared for their meal.

He left Wei Ying with strict instruction not to imbibe all their wine or eat the meat or let Bunny out of his hutch OR mess up the careful, clean order he'd left their house in until he has returned with Lee Ahn. He is dubious as to what they will return to.

The wind cuts cold as he and Lee-gonxi fly close enough to see the warm lights of their home and he dips down, fingers tight of Lee-gonxi's shoulders. "Still alright?"

Comments

[lan_wangji]

Lan Wangji loves Wei Ying very, very much. But he can feel the chilis searing the inside of his nose with the bowl still untouched. He feels certain that Lee Ahn will not comply with Lan Wangji's own 'no eating while talking' rule but does not yet reach for his food. He will set an example, regardless.

"Wei Ying can cook," he confirms, searing soup aside. "Also very intuitive with magic. Creative. Think that with my understanding of self control and Wei Ying's talents, can help you," he says, nodding towards Lee-gonxi.

[psychometricguy]

"He can cook?" Ahn mutters dubiously, looking at the pair in turn, then down at his bowl. He's not one to doubt either of them, but...actually, he is very much doubting Wangji's cooking skills at the moment. Ahn loves a good spicy meal, but he prefers there to be more soup than there is chili.

Ahn looks back up, waiting to follow their lead on when to start eating. "I'm excited to start trying," he admits, shifting a little as if unable to contain his excitement. And there are times Ahn can't; the thought of doing anything, even if it's meditating, to help understand and hopefully control his power is more than he could ever have hoped for.

[yiling_laozu]

With his own eyes on his bowl, Wei Wuxian notices nothing, pushing a large spoonful into his mouth and reddening almost at once. This is a particularly good batch, making his ears itch already!

"I can't meditate at all," he says around his spoon, looking to Lan Wangji for confirmation. "So do not be too disappointed if it is only boring and not helpful. How a person is meant to sit still and think of nothing when there are so many things to think about is beyond me."

[lan_wangji]

Lan Zhan sets down his utensils, having eaten a few bites of his rice and vegetables before he simply must interject.

"Practice," he repeats, clearly not for the first time. He takes a moment to pour the rice wine for Wei Ying and Lee-gonxi, sweeping his long sleeve carefully away from the food as he resettles. "Control over power can only come with understanding. Understanding will come through careful attention. Lee-gonxi, when your power is used, do you feel or only see?

[psychometricguy]

Suspicious as he is, Ahn still follows their lead and at least tries the soup-- he only coughs once when the heat burns his tongue and he breathes in the chili fumes, but it's not terrible. Actually, as he takes another careful sip and follows that up with a large spoonful of rice, he realizes it's actually pretty good.

"I can't sit still much either," he says between bites of food, sympathizing with Wuxian. But he is at least going to try.

Ahn looks up at the question, using the few moment he needs to finishing chewing and swallowing a rather large helping of vegetables to think on the answer. "Ah, a combination of both, I think. It's more seeing, but it's very hazy. Sometimes I feel things, but thankfully that isn't as strong."

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian beams as Ahn takes two spoonfuls of soup, already twice the amount that Lan Wangji has ever eaten. He swallows his own mouthful, taking a dutiful bite of vegetables that he washes immediately down with wine, considering as he swallows. "Is it as if you see it with your eyes, right before you?" he asks.

"Or is it more like a vision in your head?"

[lan_wangji]

Lan Wangji listens carefully, mind already cataloging any similarities between Lee Ahn's descriptions and the practices he is familiar with.

He picks out a few more vegetables, placing them on Wei Ying's plate before dishing grilled meat onto Lee Ahn's. He has no doubt Wei Ying has already eaten his share but is determined to achieve some balance in his nutrition.

[psychometricguy]

"Mm, more like a vision inside my head," Ahn says, taking a sip of the rice wine. It's a little stronger than he expects, and he grimaces a little before taking another drink.

"Like...if you close your eyes, and you think of a memory you had. The way you experience it, sometimes it's just a feeling, or sometimes you can actually see it? It's both, when I see."

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian hums. The effect is different, but he imagines it is a little like living with the Stygian Tiger Seal screaming at him endlessly, demanding to be used. Wei Wuxian quiets it - and ignores it - as best he can, but it's still maddening.

"And the visions are overwhelming?" he presses. "So powerful that you can't see past them to what is actually before you?"

[lan_wangji]

He nods along with Wei Ying's questions, unsurprised to find them insightful and focused. There is no one capable of greater focus and ingenuity than Wei Ying when a subject manages to finally capture his full attention.

"And can you feel the strain of the power in your body? For me, when using magic, feel it where my golden core rests," he says, laying a hand on his belly.

[psychometricguy]

Ahn nods vigorously at Wuxian's question, surprised he's put into words exactly what it feels like when he uses his psychometry.

"Sometimes?" he answers Wangji, touching his own stomach as he thinks about it. "I know if I do too much, it does hurt my body. I get bad nose bleeds, headaches, sometimes I get faint enough that I have to stop before I pass out."

[yiling_laozu]

Entirely like Wei Wuxian, then, though he doubts Ahn's loss of control would result in the deaths of hundreds. He busies himself with pouring more wine, first for himself and then for Ahn despite the face he knows he made.

"Lan Zhan will be very helpful, I think," he says. He'd been offered that same help many times, and he never once took it, but only because he knows where he is concerned, there are gaps in Lan Wangji's knowledge. "His Clan does not have so many rules to be poor in control."

[lan_wangji]

The thinks on Lee-Ahn's response as he eats a little more, taking a careful sip of his tea before turning to them both.

"Agree with Wei Ying," he starts, face softening as he looks at the amusing resignation on Wei Ying's face. "Teaching Lee-gonxi to control and calm his own energy will be the start. But Wei Ying will be needed. Knowledge is limited when met with an unknown. Creativity will also be needed. If this is indeed something Lee-gonxi desires."

[psychometricguy]

They keep saying the other will be helpful and great at what Ahn needs, and though it does create an interesting back and forth, Ahn figures their combined teaching should help him somewhere in the middle. At least, that's what it sounds Wangji is saying.

"Yes!" he sits up a little, making sure they are well aware how much he wants the help and how grateful he is for even the suggestion of it. "Yes of course, I want it. Anything you can think of, I want to try it."

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian smiles for Ahn's enthusiasm, even as he drains and refills his own glass twice in quick succession at the thought of the meditation to come. "What of practical trials?" he asks. "Have you spent much time trying to use your power and not be so affected, or to resist it entirely? Meditation may clear your head, but strengthening your resolve should be just as important."

[lan_wangji]

Lan Wangji thinks through scenarios they could try, ranging from objects to his own skin (he is a little reticent of what Lee=-Ahn might experience through Wei Ying's trauma) and knows he has better control of projecting his emotions.

He nods, encouraging Lee-gonxi to answer but also nods towards the food and wine, wanting to ensure they are proper hosts. It would not do to send him back home still hungry.

[psychometricguy]

Ahn dives back into the food at Wangji's little nod, surprised he'd been distracted from it in the first place.

"I haven't really done any trials trying to resist it," he admits, then stuffs his face with a large helping of rice, using the time to chew as he thinks. "I didn't think of it that way. I've tried in the past to see more but haven't tried to control how I feel."

That's actually a good distinction to make, and though Ahn hasn't really felt any regret so far, he's glad that he has someone else to point out things he hadn't even considered before.

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian hums, thinking as he slurps up his soup, lips burning. "Perhaps we could find something very new for you to touch," he suggests. Much of Darrow seems to be new, not its people or its buildings but everything else - furniture, cutlery, even the clothes seem built for convenience rather than to last. One of their funny little forks, for example, will surely hold little to be envisioned straight out of its packaging.

"Practice with a vision that won't be too intense."

[lan_wangji]

"Think Lee-gonxi's goal would be to control whether or not he saw these things. Do not yet know if that is attainable," Lan Wangji admits, grabbing a few more pieces of meat for Wei Ying and then Lee Ahn before settling back into place, posture straight and unmoving as ever.

"But retaining sense of one's self, not being overwhelmed by the vision is where to start. Wei Ying's suggestion is a good one."

[psychometricguy]

Ahn knows that's exactly where he has to start. Sungmo would often find ways to force Ahn to use his power to try to train him into getting used to it, when he found the time to actually focus on Ahn. It makes sense. But he looks around the room, thinks about all the little things in the house that Wangji and Wuxian have touched. He's been careful in their home already, keeping his hands as close to himself as possible and allowing Wangji to serve him instead of reaching out where he may accidentally touch either one of them.

He thinks about what he knows about them, and what he doesn't; they've trusted him enough to take him under their wing for now, and Ahn would very much like to not see their darkest, most painful memories if he can help it. He likes them too much to want their friendships strained by whatever he may see.

"Yes, I think we can start there," he says carefully. "As long as we can try with a stranger's things."