For Wei Ying and Ahn
Dec. 6th, 2020 04:54 pmLan Wangji already has a multitude of regrets. They are not about Lee-gonxi nor about his faith that he and Wei Ying can find a way to help him.
Wei Ying had been enthusiastic about the idea of inviting Lee-gonxi to their new home for dinner, intrigued by the idea of investigating a new type of magic, sure about the desire to help Lee-gonxi but far less so at the idea of meditation. In fact, most of Wei Ying's enthusiasm seemed centered around having a new drinking partner and the meat that Lan Wangji has prepared for their meal.
He left Wei Ying with strict instruction not to imbibe all their wine or eat the meat or let Bunny out of his hutch OR mess up the careful, clean order he'd left their house in until he has returned with Lee Ahn. He is dubious as to what they will return to.
The wind cuts cold as he and Lee-gonxi fly close enough to see the warm lights of their home and he dips down, fingers tight of Lee-gonxi's shoulders. "Still alright?"
Wei Ying had been enthusiastic about the idea of inviting Lee-gonxi to their new home for dinner, intrigued by the idea of investigating a new type of magic, sure about the desire to help Lee-gonxi but far less so at the idea of meditation. In fact, most of Wei Ying's enthusiasm seemed centered around having a new drinking partner and the meat that Lan Wangji has prepared for their meal.
He left Wei Ying with strict instruction not to imbibe all their wine or eat the meat or let Bunny out of his hutch OR mess up the careful, clean order he'd left their house in until he has returned with Lee Ahn. He is dubious as to what they will return to.
The wind cuts cold as he and Lee-gonxi fly close enough to see the warm lights of their home and he dips down, fingers tight of Lee-gonxi's shoulders. "Still alright?"
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Date: 2020-12-07 01:23 am (UTC)Left alone with only it for company, he has had some of the meat, but only a little before he set himself to making them a warming vegetable stew. He grins first at Ahn, then at Lan Wangji, appreciating the flush the cold wind has brought to his otherwise stoic face.
"Lan Zhan, you flew so fast!" he admonishes, when it's far more likely that he himself lost track of time. "The soup isn't quite done!"
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Date: 2020-12-07 01:29 am (UTC)He can smell this 'soup', just the smell enough to irritate his nose and sting his eyes. He folds his arms behind his back, still unsure how much physical affection is appropriate in front of a guest. The only answer in Cloud Recesses had been 'none at all' if the question had ever dared to be asked.
"Glad Lee-gonxi enjoyed it more, this time. Welcome to our home."
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Date: 2020-12-07 01:48 am (UTC)He lets go and surges forward to look at the little home properly, stomach already growling as he takes in the smells of a proper home cooked meal - something Ahn has, regrettably, not had much of since arriving in Darrow.
"Wow," he says, standing with his hands on his hips. "This is very nice. Very homey."
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Date: 2020-12-07 01:57 am (UTC)Leading them into the first sitting room, Wei Wuxian kicks one of the soup rags he'd discarded on his way to the door beneath the chaise, proudly stopping before the tea he'd prepared for their arrival.
"We are going to make changes," he says, "But first I must learn carpentry or something. Did you know about load bearing walls? They are very serious."
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Date: 2020-12-07 02:11 am (UTC)He nods at the tea setup, giving Wei Ying a soft smile of approval as he passes. "What are homes in Lee-gonxi's world like," he asks as he rinses off the rag and hangs it for later. "Our own are more open to outside. Less reliance on the energy that runs everything in this place."
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Date: 2020-12-07 02:22 am (UTC)Ahn follows the pair inside, glad for the warmth of the home as he slips his shoes off at the door and sets them to the side with care. He follows them into the sitting room, eyes darting all over as he tries to take everything in - including the casual use of magic. Very Harry Potter.
"Oh, tea!" he says with delight when Wuxian stops at the little table. Ahn drops to one of the cushions with ease, legs crossing underneath him. He can't remember the last time he did a proper tea service-- or maybe he just has some half-made memory of something he'd seen on television once. Either way, Ahn is happy to take part, and he looks back up to Wangji to answer his question.
"The homes in my world are like here in the city," he says, and waves around to indicate the room they're in. "Like this, but with many homes like this much closer together. And many apartment buildings like the one I live in."
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Date: 2020-12-07 02:42 am (UTC)He drops onto his own cushion, limbs sprawled and informal as he reaches forward to pour the tea. "You should move to the country," he says, as if the ease of his own transition here is not entirely due to Lan Wangji's time and money. "Especially with your abilities."
Wei Wuxian's eyes flick up from his cup. He actually hadn't meant to be his usual, abrupt self, but a few moments are all it takes to forget himself. "If it's more comfortable, I mean."
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Date: 2020-12-07 03:36 am (UTC)"Wei Ying and I both want to try and help you," he murmurs, taking a sip of his own tea before settling it down carefully. "Also just having you for dinner. Only what Lee-gonxi is comfortable with."
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Date: 2020-12-07 03:53 am (UTC)"I'm comfortable with anything." Having any sort of control at this point would be a huge step up compared to how he's been living so far. "I have to at least try."
He picks up the cup of tea in front of him, hesitating only long enough to make sure he doesn't see anything before taking a sip. "I'm not sure I could live out in a home in the country side on my own," he says with a little snort. "My hyung at home is a prosecutor and made enough money to make sure we were always taken care of. This is the first time I've ever truly lived on my own."
Maybe Ahn should have done more to thank Sungmo for taking him in like he did, but he'd always insisted it was to make up for the years that he'd left Ahn alone. That had always been a hard reason to argue against, in the end.
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Date: 2020-12-07 04:11 am (UTC)"With any of it." He prefers the countryside, but it's also true that Wei Wuxian is a little bored without constant evil to vanquish. Peace is strange to him, enough that he must fill his days up with noise, made by himself if need be. It would probably be a relief to Lan Wangji were he to find more distractions.
"How did you make your living at home?" he asks, not quite certain what a prosecutor is.
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Date: 2020-12-07 04:29 am (UTC)He is also interested in the answer, unsure of the same thing as he sets cups in front of Wei Ying and Lee Ahn before walking back to the kitchen for the food, listening carefully for the answer.
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Date: 2020-12-07 05:00 am (UTC)He stares at Wangji's sudden display of affection with wide eyes, delighted to see it. While Ahn doesn't feel he can tease Wangji just yet, he is filing away everything he can for future ammunition.
"Ahh..." Ahn takes another long sip of his tea as he considers the question, trying to figure out how to answer it without sounding like a complete loser. He'd never made it into university, hadn't even started trying to cheat on the police entrance exam before Jaein caught and stopped him. Regular customer-facing jobs had been out of the question.
"I didn't make a living for myself, really." He scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. "Hyung makes a lot of money, and he always bought what I needed."
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Date: 2020-12-07 05:43 am (UTC)He leans forward. "When I started my own clan, there was a precious little one. I fed and clothed him, and do you know what he most often asked me? When is Brother Rich coming to visit again?" Wei Wuxian grins and shakes his head.
"Perhaps we are destined to be dependent on great men, while we lie about, mmm, what should we be doing?" He catches Lan Wangji's eye and winks. "Looking pretty?"
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Date: 2020-12-07 05:55 am (UTC)"The Sect I was born into has some wealth," he explains to Lee Ahn, hoping that he knows already to only take Wei Ying's stories lightly in terms of correctness. "Largely due to rules against opulence. And Wei Ying is not dependent for everything. Wei Ying contributes greatly."
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Date: 2020-12-08 02:49 am (UTC)"Wangji-ah, can you adopt me?" he asks, attempting to muster up the full force of his best aegyo but he's still giggling too much to even attempt a pout. The best Ahn can manage is big, innocent eyes. "I know how to grill meat!"
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Date: 2020-12-09 03:18 am (UTC)He takes up the ladle, pouring a serving of soup into three bowls, blinking when the steam stings his eyes. "Aiya, did the chilis multiply?"
[actual footabe of wwx's soup -_-]
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Date: 2020-12-09 04:03 am (UTC)"Wei Ying can cook," he confirms, searing soup aside. "Also very intuitive with magic. Creative. Think that with my understanding of self control and Wei Ying's talents, can help you," he says, nodding towards Lee-gonxi.
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Date: 2020-12-09 04:45 am (UTC)Ahn looks back up, waiting to follow their lead on when to start eating. "I'm excited to start trying," he admits, shifting a little as if unable to contain his excitement. And there are times Ahn can't; the thought of doing anything, even if it's meditating, to help understand and hopefully control his power is more than he could ever have hoped for.
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Date: 2020-12-09 05:01 am (UTC)"I can't meditate at all," he says around his spoon, looking to Lan Wangji for confirmation. "So do not be too disappointed if it is only boring and not helpful. How a person is meant to sit still and think of nothing when there are so many things to think about is beyond me."
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Date: 2020-12-09 05:12 am (UTC)"Practice," he repeats, clearly not for the first time. He takes a moment to pour the rice wine for Wei Ying and Lee-gonxi, sweeping his long sleeve carefully away from the food as he resettles. "Control over power can only come with understanding. Understanding will come through careful attention. Lee-gonxi, when your power is used, do you feel or only see?
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Date: 2020-12-09 06:06 am (UTC)"I can't sit still much either," he says between bites of food, sympathizing with Wuxian. But he is at least going to try.
Ahn looks up at the question, using the few moment he needs to finishing chewing and swallowing a rather large helping of vegetables to think on the answer. "Ah, a combination of both, I think. It's more seeing, but it's very hazy. Sometimes I feel things, but thankfully that isn't as strong."
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Date: 2020-12-09 06:20 am (UTC)"Or is it more like a vision in your head?"
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Date: 2020-12-09 06:29 am (UTC)He picks out a few more vegetables, placing them on Wei Ying's plate before dishing grilled meat onto Lee Ahn's. He has no doubt Wei Ying has already eaten his share but is determined to achieve some balance in his nutrition.
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Date: 2020-12-09 06:34 am (UTC)"Like...if you close your eyes, and you think of a memory you had. The way you experience it, sometimes it's just a feeling, or sometimes you can actually see it? It's both, when I see."
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Date: 2020-12-09 06:53 am (UTC)"And the visions are overwhelming?" he presses. "So powerful that you can't see past them to what is actually before you?"
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Date: 2020-12-09 07:08 am (UTC)"And can you feel the strain of the power in your body? For me, when using magic, feel it where my golden core rests," he says, laying a hand on his belly.
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Date: 2020-12-10 02:45 am (UTC)"Sometimes?" he answers Wangji, touching his own stomach as he thinks about it. "I know if I do too much, it does hurt my body. I get bad nose bleeds, headaches, sometimes I get faint enough that I have to stop before I pass out."
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Date: 2020-12-10 03:49 am (UTC)"Lan Zhan will be very helpful, I think," he says. He'd been offered that same help many times, and he never once took it, but only because he knows where he is concerned, there are gaps in Lan Wangji's knowledge. "His Clan does not have so many rules to be poor in control."
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Date: 2020-12-10 04:03 am (UTC)"Agree with Wei Ying," he starts, face softening as he looks at the amusing resignation on Wei Ying's face. "Teaching Lee-gonxi to control and calm his own energy will be the start. But Wei Ying will be needed. Knowledge is limited when met with an unknown. Creativity will also be needed. If this is indeed something Lee-gonxi desires."
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Date: 2020-12-10 04:34 am (UTC)"Yes!" he sits up a little, making sure they are well aware how much he wants the help and how grateful he is for even the suggestion of it. "Yes of course, I want it. Anything you can think of, I want to try it."
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Date: 2020-12-12 02:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-12-12 04:02 am (UTC)He nods, encouraging Lee-gonxi to answer but also nods towards the food and wine, wanting to ensure they are proper hosts. It would not do to send him back home still hungry.
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Date: 2020-12-15 01:55 am (UTC)"I haven't really done any trials trying to resist it," he admits, then stuffs his face with a large helping of rice, using the time to chew as he thinks. "I didn't think of it that way. I've tried in the past to see more but haven't tried to control how I feel."
That's actually a good distinction to make, and though Ahn hasn't really felt any regret so far, he's glad that he has someone else to point out things he hadn't even considered before.
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Date: 2020-12-19 10:38 pm (UTC)"Practice with a vision that won't be too intense."
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Date: 2020-12-23 03:26 am (UTC)"But retaining sense of one's self, not being overwhelmed by the vision is where to start. Wei Ying's suggestion is a good one."
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Date: 2020-12-27 05:55 am (UTC)He thinks about what he knows about them, and what he doesn't; they've trusted him enough to take him under their wing for now, and Ahn would very much like to not see their darkest, most painful memories if he can help it. He likes them too much to want their friendships strained by whatever he may see.
"Yes, I think we can start there," he says carefully. "As long as we can try with a stranger's things."